I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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