Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
