Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
We are two peas in an std pod
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I need a burrito and a hug.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
