Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize