508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
My dick has a subreddit
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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