The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
