he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
