Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
