How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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