belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
