he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Randomize
