hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
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