the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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