Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize