there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
