are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Randomize
