I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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