Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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