she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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