By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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