Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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