Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
