Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
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