i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
