I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I think people are normalizing furries
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
