I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
that's an acceptable place to lick
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
The struggles of a small town man whore
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
