what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
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