dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
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