Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
