There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
