I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
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