North Korea, Best Korea!
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
