Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
3 2 1 whiskey
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
