There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
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