Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize