Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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