Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
My balls are so social today.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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