i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I don't think brook has ever known best
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
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