i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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