we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize