I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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