Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Randomize
