We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Randomize
