BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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