ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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