Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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