so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
