it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she pinky promised me she was 18
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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