You work out of a Hotel?
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize