Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM VODKA MAN
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize