we're blogging at a bar
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
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