You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
